Dear Mr Adams,

My name is Trevor McDonald and I am 42. I am a popular Topical Debator on the internets and have been labeled with the award “Topical Debator of the Years” for my debates. I am also a rightwinged bloke who is a one manned think tank. For a crust I collect the old bones from butchers (would you like your lawn fertalised?). I do this part time for cash.

Now I am a strait talking bloke and I am owed $100,000 dollars by the Australian Skeptical Society as I have discovered undisputable evidence of paranormal alien activity from. My step-brother Wayne (a Collingwood supporter) and I were visiting our step dad at Traralgon Prison recently. While walking in some back streets to find a new TV cabinet in the form of a milk crate we came accross this.

It is what is known as a crop circle made by a paranormal alien space craft.

Now, I know that you have never paid the 100 grand before but you’d better get you’re check book out. Now I am also on the Centrelinks payment so if the check could be made out to my defacto Wendy that would cut around the red tape.

Yours Truly
Trevor McDonald.

PA: clearly an elephant stopped and crapped in the grass….are you telling me it’s an elephant from outer space?

Me: Thank you for your very promt reply to my claim. No I’m not sure if your trying to pull a fast one but we all know there are no elephants in outer space.

Cheers,
Trev

PA: no elephants in outer space? that’s because they all land heavily on Earth and make splodge marks in wheat fields…

Me: I guess this means my planned trip to Bali is off.

Wayne is pretty upset. He had a new Collingwood Darren Millane tattoo planned. I told him I can design a new one for him on MS Paint and do a DIY with a needle and a bic pen.

So much for trying to challenge “science”.

(Mr Adams may still pay up, he seems like a nice bloke who likes to asks questions about other possibles)

UPDATE: Phillip Adams responds:

The cheque for 100,000 is in the mail -so enjoy yourself in Bali…but be careful of falling coconuts…not as big as falling elephants but far more numerous….seriously, a friend of mine got killed up there when he copped a coconut on his nut…best to carry a brolly.

So it looks like Wayne and I are off to Bali courtesy of prominent leftist Phillip Adams!