According to social demographer Bernard Salt, the rise in single-person households in Australia is due to a whopping increase in our society of “sad, lonely old baby boomers. The widowed, separated and divorced”.
Oh, fuck off, Bernard.
Bernard belongs to that curious demographic of demographers and social researchers whose lives appear to be devoted to telling other people precisely how their lives are completely fucked (even if they’ve been blissfully unaware of this until now), how they’ll be fucked forever, and how they will die a lonely, feeble and unutterably miserable death, leaving naught behind but tears on a pillow and a few sad, solitary stains on the bedsheets.
Joining Bernard yesterday was Bettina Arndt, a woman whose life appears to revolve around telling other people how to fuck.
Try this quick quiz …
Which of the following does not belong:
1. Legless.
2. Armless.
3. Headless.
4. Childless.
In one of the most staggeringly stupid articles I have ever read (and one that a friend of mine referred to as “the dumbest column of the decade” yesterday), Arndt sets about lamenting Prime Minister Julia Gillard’s status as a single woman without children in a de facto relationship as a bad example to other women and a situation that will, somewhat inevitably in Arndt’s mind, rise up to bite Julia savagely in the arse as she totters uncomfortably toward old age and lonely decrepitude.
Arndt appears to believe that, just as person without a head is not a complete human being, a woman without a child is also rather incomplete and unfulfilled. And a woman without a wedding ring and a basket of her man’s streak-marked y-fronts to scrub is a sad and tragic thing to behold.
(Bettina’s next trick will be a treatise on the evils of dancing, followed by a spirited address to the local temperance union, and then a quick dusting of her favourite bonnet and hoop skirt before popping off to a tent revival meeting for some snake handling and an incoherent gibber.)
The response to Arndt’s article online yesterday (over 500 comments) and in the SMH letters page today is telling, to say the least.
For the general consensus appears to be, “Oh, fuck off, Bettina”.
We have, most certainly, moved on. We have moved on from those days when a child born out of wedlock was regarded as “illegitimate”, a “bastard”. We have moved on from those days when a couple co-habiting were said to be “living in sin”. We have moved on from those days where unmarried women were regarded as “spinsters”, and unmarried men “confirmed bachelors”. We have moved on from those days when a woman should simply lie back, submit, and think of England.
We have. Arndt has not, and she cuts a rather sad and lonely figure herself now, a solitary and irrelevant soul wailing at us over the untidy state of our emotional lives and expecting us to gnash our teeth and beat our breasts and bemoan our tragic circumstances in return so that she may earn her supper.
It’s rubbish.
But it’s not just the likes of Arndt and Salt, it’s every fucking thing.
Every aspect of our life, the conscious choices we have made, the circumstances that have simply arisen from events, our consumption of anything and everything, what we have done, what we have not done, what we may do and how we do it is shoved under some knobhead’s microscope, and inevitably, we are found to be wanting in all things, inadequate in all ways and means, our choices deemed to be a danger to all and sundry, not least ourselves, and the message finally transmitted amounts to, “You are sadly and tragically incomplete, wrong and invalid, you are not right, and you will die horribly”.
I, for one, am heartily sick of it, for it is elephantine bullshit of the highest order, and it is the type of bullshit that appears to propel much of mainstream media these days, given that mainstream media in Australia now revolves chiefly around “opinion” pieces, hysteria, gossip and trivialities.
I know and have known, married and unmarried couples with children, married couples without, gay couples who have been committed to each other for decades, gay couples with children, single men and single women with children, and happily contented single men and women who would rather stick a fork in their eye than fart about on R.S.V.P desperate for a date.
These are all adults who have made decisions, some right, some wrong. They are adults who have made choices, some good, some bad. They have done these things for themselves, and when something has gone awry, being adults, they deal with it and move on.
They, and I, do not need some chipper-voiced cunt with a clipboard and a book advance poking their fingers in our chests and wagging them in our faces to lecture us on how we have failed to meet their lofty expectations by not living up to some mythical standard of social legitimacy.
Bettina, meet Bernard.
Now fuck off, the both of you.

#1 by Spock... on 30 June 2010 - 1:38 pm
Quote
Hear, hear!
And can I add, the only thing I hate more than YES/NO polls, is street VoxPops.
#2 by Spock... on 30 June 2010 - 1:39 pm
Quote
Also, in regards to the evils of dancing, where do you find this stuff?
#3 by Ross Sharp on 30 June 2010 - 1:47 pm
Quote
I just stumbled across it a few years ago by happy accident. This type of stuff tends to stick in my mind.
What that says about my mind, I know not.
#4 by Scott Bridges on 30 June 2010 - 1:51 pm
Quote
I endorse this post.
#5 by Mortisha on 30 June 2010 - 1:51 pm
Quote
Bettina & Bernard are screaming towards irrelevance. Best they stick to articles for their church’s monthly newsletter.
#6 by invig on 30 June 2010 - 1:55 pm
Quote
Nice article. They think they can do a fly-by of life and judge the rest of us?!
My assault on these bastards is two-pronged: a) find pattern of lack of convergence in their theory over years and b) match bits and pieces to my theory to show they’ve glimpsed ‘reality’ occasionally from afar.
They’ve been running around and through the forest without having the guts to go inside and live there. The footprints will be found.
#7 by reb on 30 June 2010 - 1:55 pm
Quote
Fabulous post Ross! Well said!!
Another term I hate with a vengence that these “demograophers” use is “empty nesters”. A term they use to describe people in their fifties whose kids have now left home.
It suggests that the sole function in one’s lifetime is to spurt out kids and then your useful life is over.
Fuck all these people. FUCK THEM ALL!!!
#8 by Steven H. on 30 June 2010 - 1:56 pm
Quote
Perfect.
#9 by Ross Sharp on 30 June 2010 - 1:57 pm
Quote
I endorse Reb’s sentiments.
#10 by exford legs on 30 June 2010 - 7:38 pm
Quote
Wonderful article. Opinion journalism must now pass the ‘knobhead’s microscope’ test.
#11 by Fiona on 30 June 2010 - 9:04 pm
Quote
here here.
‘scuse me while I go have a life and opinions and perhaps maybe something other to do than marry and start pooping out babies at 18.
Oh, wait? I’m not useful. screw that.
#12 by Spock... on 17 July 2010 - 1:43 am
Quote
All first time comments are moderated. This is to help fight against spam, trolls and lawsuits.
#13 by Ann on 17 July 2010 - 11:40 am
Quote
It amazes me that you seem to feel justified in writing highly offensive personal attacks on individual people. I wonder what makes you comment in this way?
#14 by Ann on 17 July 2010 - 11:41 am
Quote
Why do you request moderating my comment?
#15 by Ann on 17 July 2010 - 11:49 am
Quote
Thanks for your answer to my 2nd question. However, I am most interested in your answer to my 1st question, ie. what makes you attack individual people in a personal way? Surely it is possible to just discuss the relevant issues?
#16 by Spock... on 17 July 2010 - 1:03 pm
Quote
I will leave that for Ross to respond to, but I don’t think there was any unfair attacking of the person given the content of the article that he is commenting on.
#17 by invig on 17 July 2010 - 2:42 pm
Quote
I’ll respond.
Who cares? Who cares about attacks on the person. If they are true, then the person should deal with them. But that is up to them.
Otherwise, character provides meat to a narrative, and allows one to make a case more compelling and emphatic.
People are too sensitive, including you, Ann. Stop defending those who can defend themselves should they wish to. And stop concerning yourself with personal aspects of a conversation that have nothing to do with you.
Respond to the objective points made. If you cannot, it is your problem.