Speaking to The Press Club recently about Kevin Rudd’s proposed S!U!P!E!R! M!I!N!I!N!G! T!A!X!, mining magnate and Professor, Dr. Clive Palmer had this to say …

Do you honestly believe that Jacques Cousteau spent all those decades sailing around the oceans of the world only to come home and be told he couldn’t sit down after a hard day’s work to a plate of fish fingers and a prawn cocktail or three because Wayne Swan had killed all the fish with this super resource tax?

That’s what Kevin Rudd and Wayne Swan are going to do! They’re going to kill all the fish with this tax, and the mums and dads of Australia won’t be able to give their kiddies a Nemo in a bag for Christmas because there won’t be any bloody Nemo’s left!

You only to have read “Mein Kampff” to realise that. Right there, there’s Kevin Rudd’s name, right next to The Mad Hatter and Mao Tse-Tung and that Gatsby bloke, the Robert Redford fella. Google it on Facebook, and you’ll find all those emails, right there, they’ll be staring you straight in the page of your face.

This government wants to take all our rocks and give them to Hugo Chavez! You know what he’s gonna do with them? He’s gonna throw ‘em at Tasmania! He’s gonna bomb the Salamanca Markets with the rocks we owned, the ones Kevin Rudd gave away, just because they make pies with scallops down there but all the scallops are dead, so now they’re making them with snails instead!

Why should ordinary, everyday Australians be forced to eat snails with their pie?!

A miner’s not a bird.

If a miner was a bird he’d be back up a tree chewing on a worm in Perth. Or a snail.

We don’t eat seeds.

We’re all about rocks, we make televisions out of them. And flying duck ornaments.

If Rudd and Swan get this tax over the line, your grandmother can wave goodbye to her ducks!

And we’ll just take our business elsewhere.

To Saturn.

There are these huge rings there, full of rocks, full of flying rocks, so we’ll just go there for our ducks.

We’ll take all the discarded fishnets that are useless now because they killed all the fish and we’ll catch rocks with them instead, we’ll throw them out of the spaceboat and make our ducks on Saturn.

Yes.