At a job interview …
Q: If we were to offer you the job, where would you like to see yourself in 10 years time?
A: In 10 years time, I’ll be 61 years old, so I’d like to see myself as retired.
Stupid job interview questions.
Have at it.
Ask a stupid question …
#1 by David Bonnici on 22 April 2010 - 2:05 pm
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Q – What’s your biggest fault?
A – Uhm yeah, like I spent four hours on the job application, got my CV made up professionally for way too much money, made it through three short lists, bought a suit, drove by your office on the weekend to make sure I knew where I was coming today, studied your shit website to get an idea of how your company works and now you want me to tell you why you shouldn’t hire me? Fuck off potential employee!
#2 by Ross Sharp on 22 April 2010 - 2:29 pm
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Here’s another one …
Q: If an employee who reported in to you complained that he/she was too busy to do the work you had set for them and had no desire to do it, how would you deal with that?
A: I’d tell HR to sack the lazy cunt.
#3 by Dam Buster of Preston on 22 April 2010 - 2:33 pm
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Q: Where do you see yourself in 5 years time?
A: On that side of the desk asking that question of someone else.
#4 by Scott Bridges on 22 April 2010 - 3:01 pm
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“Why should we select you over the other applicants?”
Let me meet them and then I’ll tell you.
#5 by Molesworth on 22 April 2010 - 3:02 pm
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Q: Where do you see yourself in 5 years time?
A: Battling Godzilla on Mars.
#6 by Aubrey on 22 April 2010 - 3:04 pm
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Q. What’s the hardest decision you have had to make and how did you go about it?
A. Pulling the plug on my brain injured father. You really want me to go into it?
(Actual Q and A from a public service grad interview)
#7 by Jason on 22 April 2010 - 3:14 pm
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Q. Why do you want this job?
A. Apart from the money?
#8 by Spock... on 22 April 2010 - 4:03 pm
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Q: Tell me about a time you went ‘the extra mile’ for a customer.
A: Well there was chick with really big tits…
I had a friend who was applying for a job at my old work, I asked the boss what she should put on her cover letter to give her the best chance of getting the job:
“I have big tits and put out. I’d hire her without looking at her resume”
#9 by Rx on 22 April 2010 - 4:50 pm
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I’d see myself doing your job, dummy.
#10 by Andy B on 22 April 2010 - 4:59 pm
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Years back I went for a job in an office. The interviewers talked a little about the job and explained that the department had a number of different managers, each responsible for a different aspect.
I got this:
“If one manager gave you a task that was urgent, and another manager asked you to make him a coffee, what would you do?”
“I’d tell him I’m busy with real work and that if he decided to make himself a coffee that he was welcome to make me one too”.
Surprisingly I didn’t get that job.
#11 by Marek Bage on 22 April 2010 - 7:03 pm
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Q: Where do you see yourself in 5 years.
A: Sober and out of parole, what the fuck did you think?
#12 by Bron on 22 April 2010 - 11:04 pm
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Q. What can you bring to this role?
A. Hire me and you’ll find out.
#13 by Mac Yourselfathome on 23 April 2010 - 9:18 pm
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I got asked this question just last week:
Q: How would you deal with a manager that tended to intefere, change their mind a lot, bypass you and intimidate your staff?
A: You’re not in sales are you?
#14 by David Irving (no relation) on 27 April 2010 - 4:20 pm
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They no longer ask me where I see myself in 5 years during my annual performance reviews. I’ve already made it pretty plain that the answer is “3 years retired.”