As Prime Minister, I am very much aware, as is everyone in my Government (1) of the enormous sacrifices, the toll, both physical and emotional, that carers, those most selfless and compassionate members of our community, make and endure over the course of their lives on behalf of their severely disabled loved ones.
May I just say this (2).
Whether it is the devotion of a parent or parents to the care of their physically and/or intellectually disabled child (3), or of a wife or husband to their beloved spouse (4), I’m sure all Australians would join with me, and my Government, in applauding your herculean efforts, and pledging our support in doing everything and anything (5) within our power to relieve the everyday burdens, the maintenance and upkeep, the unthinkable stress that you valiantly and bravely struggle with every minute of every day of your lives.
To that end, may I just say this (6).
My Government is determined to work as closely and as thoroughly as is required with the States (7) to do whatever is necessary to address the challenges this issue presents us (8), and arrive at viable, workable and economically sound solutions.
As a nation founded on the core Christian principles of compassion, care and a fair go for all, I can assure you, I can assure all of you, that you are in our hearts, our minds, our souls, and you will not be forgotten.
Thank you. (9)
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(1) It’s a state issue.
(2) It’s a state issue.
(3) Why didn’t you just scrape, bag and flush the useless lump of spastic trash into the fucking toilet when you had the chance, you dense cunts? It’s economically unviable from a national productivity point of view to keep shit like that alive. Of course, as a Christian, I could not have endorsed such a choice, but you wouldn’t have had to tell anyone, would you? Dickwads.
(4) Try slug bait in the gruel.
(5) Absolutely nothing. Nothing at all.
(6) I’m thinking maybe I could visit the home of one of these retards, give mum a pat on the shoulder, bring a box of Huggies, bring the networks, squeeze out a few tears, should play well in the media, take people’s minds off all this coons on boats thing for a bit.
(7) It’s a state issue.
(8) We’ll make a few noises in the run-up to the next election.
(9) Wanna see me light my farts?

team@groupthink.com.au

#1 by stace on 5 November 2009 - 2:51 pm
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Ross, I think you need to sauce this piece up a bit. As a group we’re a little…disinterested. Perhaps some pictures. You know, some nudie wheelchair shots, funniest disabled home videos, perhaps some actual cracker night fart shots. A double happy exploding out of someone’s bum always gets us going.
#2 by Mr Pastry on 5 November 2009 - 3:20 pm
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Now now then … laughing at the afflicted and less able in our community is just not on and quite distasteful, so please lay off Kevin Rudd, he can’t help it.
#3 by reb on 5 November 2009 - 3:24 pm
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“A double happy exploding out of someone’s bum always gets us going.”
Not to mention “a thundercracker!”
#4 by stace on 5 November 2009 - 3:41 pm
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On a more serious note, Bill Shorten has spoken about this often. The general public really don’t rate this issue at all, and until they do, nothing will change.
On an even more serious note, mind where you point that double happy. You’ll have someone’s eye out!
#5 by Ross Sharp on 5 November 2009 - 4:07 pm
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Goverment’s have better things to do with money. Like baby bonuses and home buyer grants. And throwing parties on bridges for 6000 people.
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